I'm not much of a leaper. I like my feet on solid ground. I suppose this is because I had a rather chaotic, and at times, desperate childhood. And being that childhood is a time when we have very little control over what happens to us, in my adult life I've liked things, well, predictable.
But two weeks from today, I'm taking, what is for me, a big leap of faith: I'm leaving what has been a very stable, predictable, and rewarding career as a librarian and becoming a full time writer. I had decided a while back that when I sold my fourth book (which I have, and more to come on that soon!), I'd leave the library system. It's just getting too hard, with soon-to-be-four books to promote, and more books I want to write, to shoehorn everything in around my job.
I'm terrified, yes. I love the regularity of my paycheck, and I love the structure of going to work. On days when writing feels like something I'm a total loser at, I love going to work and feeling like a success. And I'll miss that delicious moment of connecting a reader with a book.
It also feels like leaving the safe haven of home for me too. Libraries have always had a very important place in my life and in my heart. When I was a painfully shy child, I hid out in the school library rather than eat alone in the cafeteria. Miss Conway, the librarian in my elementary school, allowed me to help her alphabetize the cards for the card catalogue, shelve books, and explore to my heart's content in the library. Later, when we moved yet again when I was at that most painful age of thirteen, I again hid out in the school library rather than endure lunch alone in the school cafeteria. I've alway, always felt safe and secure in libraries. And I'm in good company too. Jack London had a terrible childhood and found haven in his local library. Ray Bradbury is famous for saying, "Libraries raised me." Me too, Ray, me too.
But it's time for me to leave that safe shore and head out for the life of a writer. I owe it to my books and all the stories yet to be told. I owe it to the writer in me.
Wish me luck!